Well said.

*pummeled. A pommel is the hilt of a sword.

And I believe the student should have taken the bullying video to his teachers, parents, the principal, youtube, the media, the superintendent of schools... somebody. How is it the kid managed to catch this on video but never thought to catch the bullying before it?

Your question is trolling in my opinion. You ask what I would rather have the victim do and then praise him for acting the way he did. Those are two different situations. Do I condem the kid for doing it: NO WAY! I spent a good deal of my childhood being bullied and view this video with fond fantasies of bashing the guys that bullied me.

But there are better way top handle it BEFORE it gets to the breaking point.

Henry - The kid didn't catch this on video - it was the bully's friends who were videotaping it and put it up on YouTube. The student should go to his teachers, principal?? That does nothing, we all know that! You are clearly out of touch. This kid did what he had to do, and I'm glad he did. No one will fight back for you if you are not willing to fight back yourself. If you want to be a door mat to society, then so be it. Glad this kid decided not to be one anymore.

Man, I hope you don't get the wrong food at the drive-thru. You'd have no problem going inside and beating the teller, huh?

I never advocated laying there and taking the abuse. I absolutely think the kid should have done something. AND KEEP DOING SOMETHING until it works. How come no one has asked his parents why they hadn't taken this issue up with local authorities? Where are the adults in all of this?

You bring up a valid point: pragmatically, telling the teacher won't solve the issue. Then I have to ask: Why not? What were the teachers doing that was more important than seeing after the safety of this kid? What had the school done to instill a sense of safety in this child? Why hadn't the adults in charge taken steps to make this kids school safe from this kind of bullying?

You guys are just gonna dump the kid in school and hope he fends for himself? No help from the faculty or staff. No outlet to show him how society is SUPPOSED to work. Just teach him to hit back and we'll be fine.

I am not out of touch sir. It appears you have watched one too many action movies. Real life isn't like that. There are civilized steps to take that allow most of us to live in relative peace with each other. If we take no steps to show our kids how to act and react in a civilized society then they will grow up learning that hitting back makes you famous, so it's OK.

I doubt going to the principal would have really worked. All that would have done is make the bully more sly. The only time a bully stops is when it becomes more dangerous for the bully to be one than he cares to accept. At that point he will move on to easier targets.

Trying to take the high moral road only tells the bully he's got his easy mark. In a lot of ways it's better to fight back - even if you end up getting your butt kicked than stand there and do nothing. If you keep fighting back, eventually the bully will move on to someone else less painful for him.

Saying this, I would still pursue help from teachers and the principal and hopefully get the bully removed from the school. But I still think the kid should defend himself.

I doubt going to the principal would have really worked.

And why not? That's the part of the system that needs to be fixed. Not aggrandizing violent behavior. There are civil ways to "stand up for yourself". And teaching the victim that the system doesn't work so you might as well take matters into your own hands is probably a bad lesson to have. I have never advocated stand there, that's not being civil, that's being stupid. I have been on the other side of these types of bullies and I was creative enough to find civil ways to stand up for myself. I also had the support of parents that held the school district accountable.

Henry, your approach to this is very idealistic. Yes, in a fully enlightened society, the adults in this situation (teachers, parents) should be able to step in and solve the issue. But the real world doesn't work this way. I know from seeing the issue when I was a child, as a parent, and from being a teacher.

Punching the clerk at the drive-thru window is really overstating the case. This child didn't react to the bullying the first time it was done to him, and he didn't go beyond what was necessary to get it to stop right then.

There are civil ways to "stand up for yourself"

What should he have done? Gone on a hunger strike?

@ Henry - It would only work if the bully was removed permanently from school. Like I said, otherwise all that will happen is the bully will become more sly about his bullying.

Why is defending yourself wrong? Do you really expect someone to stand there and take hit after hit? Even if they turn and run, they can get beat pretty bad before they find protection from some adult and probably set themselves up as a target for the bully that replaces the one that got expelled.

Sometimes a person just has to fight.

Why is defending yourself wrong?

Why is hitting the only way to defend yourself?

@RandomB, yes, my approach is idealized... but civil. I never have advocated that the kid stand there and get hit. That's not standing up for yourself, that's being stupid.

What I have advocated is Casey's right and responsibility to use the system. Do you understand that you are asking us to abandon the system because it doesn't work and thus making the system even less effective? It will then work even less the next time and so on. This type of self-fulfilling dementia is not the best way to keep a civilization together. Why isn't anyone outraged that this school doesn't uphold simple statutes that avoid this kind of conflict? Why isn't anyone up in arms that the faculty at the school, Casey's parents and local law enforcement let the situation get to this point?

You may call my approach idealistic, but I'd rather live in my idealistic world than get the crap kicked out of me in yours.

One of my sons was bullied terribly in school. I tried for over a year to get the school district to do something to protect him. He has a rare form of muscular dystrophy and the teachers were very aware that he was being abused by three boys on a daily basis ... I didn't know at the time but I found out a couple years later that three boys would drag him behind the dumpsters and take turns holding his arms and beating and kicking him.

The teachers actively encouraged it IN CLASS by telling everyone that if a boy couldn't defend himself he wasn't "all boy". Finally, the way it ended was a group of brothers and their friends followed and surrounded the three boys and told them if they wanted to fight they would have to fight them from now on.

The recess teacher then called the brothers Mother and told them how proud she should be of her boys for standing up to the bullies to help "the crippled kid" that got drug behind the dumpsters EVERY DAY. You cannot tell me that adults don't know what is going on. I live in a small town where everybody knows everybody and I was FURIOUS when I finally found out what was actually happening.

I wish my boy would have been physically able to protect himself. But I am very grateful for the boys who took pity on my son and stood up for him. I think the kid standing up for himself did a good thing. Nobody should have to go to school every day feeling the dread of knowing you're going to be assaulted and knowing no teacher will help you.

I say Go Casey!

Do you understand that you are asking us to abandon the system because it doesn't work and thus making the system even less effective?

No, I'm saying that the system has never worked, and with increasing liability issues with schools being unable to effectively discipline troublemakers, it's getting worse. I'm saying fix the problem before you condemn the alternative.

I wish I have done this to one kid in schcool, it would have gave me alot of self respect even today. In my opinion there should be removed from public schools and put in spacific schools that contains only bullies. Then they grew up to be roofer or construction workers wich is part of their destiny.

My hope is one day people will NOT stand and watch but INTERVENE when an injustice occurs.

Edmund Burke said, ‘The only thing necessary for the triumph [of evil] is for good men to do nothing.’

I agree with Gneisenau. I was repeatedly jabbed with a pen while in elementary school. My parents reported to the principal as well as the teachers. After a meeting with the bully's parents, the kid was suspended only to return and torment me every day for the next year. I had to transfer to another school. The system doesn't work in the real world as much as we hope to believe in it. Now a mother of three, 2 of my kids were picked on in kindergarten where one took a chunk of skin from my son's shoulders and another left his teeth marks on my daughter's nose. The 5 yr old bully was suspended for 3 days while the parents took no blame for her son's actions only to argue why we targeted her child. The entire class witness the trauma and it took 2 months of numerous reports before that child was removed from the school. It all begins at home. I taught my kids to use their words and not their hands but in reality we must teach them to defend themselves. Always believe your child when they come to you, regardless.

I'm saying fix the problem

As am I. Except I'm adding "Before you condone the alternative."

Except I'm adding "Before you condone the alternative."

That makes no sense. If the "system" (adults settling the conflicts) worked, there wouldn't need to be an alternative.

Henry- there's nothing 'trolling' about my above question and, in fact, I think it an entirely fair question. Bottom line, our children will still encounter bullying out there because it's impossible to counter all forms of it. Teaching a child that it is always wrong to hit another child sets him up to become the school punching bag because he will take it: Bullies are cowards and they always take aim on the weak. Teach a child assertiveness and to fend for themselves when some other kid tries to lay a hand on them and you end the bullying where it starts.

I did not suggest to 'praise' a child for defending themself, however, I believe positively reinforcing them is appropriate so they know that it is ok to do so- there's a difference. So whether the bully gets pummelled/pommelled (whatever) is one thing, but at least your child shows that he won't take it either sending a message to other bullies.

RandomB, you are condoning the alternative. As opposed to fixing the problem, you are advocating we leave it be and teach kids to stick up for themselves through violence. I think it would be more civilized to fix the system rather than advocate violence.

The young man is being condemned by some for defending himself against his bully; he should have stood there and taken it to prove himself the "better man" they say. But what is the MB's proxy army, the US and European forces, doing in Libya but stepping in to murderously fight against the perceived bully Qadhafi so that even worse MB bullies can take power? (Oh, that's right, we'll gain support from the Muslim world if we do its bidding ;-).

Killing one tyrant to replace him with another even worse tyrant (Allah) who commands his slaves to fight jihad; kill, subjugate or enslave all who do not worship him -- even those who think they are gaining some points by temporarily siding with him -- and encourages them to do so suicidally with promises of the virgins of paradise, does not seem like the prudent thing to do. But prudence has been lacking in the West for a long time now; it has been displaced by the opposite of prudence: appeasement and submission to those who do not base their laws on humane values or reason, but rather on the self-aggrandizing medieval laws of a murderous 7th century brigand who claimed himself to be the only true prophet of God.

And doesn't it seem that some of the same folks who condemn the young man for using disproportionate force when defending himself are speaking out of the other side of their mouth's when they extol the West to disproportionately bombard Qadhafi and his forces?

I'm not defending Qadhafi, mind you, but as bad as that man was, and is, what will emerge in Libya and the ME, as well as in Europe and America eventually, will make him look like a Boy Scout.

you are advocating we leave it be and teach kids to stick up for themselves through violence

When did I say that? I'm not saying the status quo is tolerable at all. How would you propose, and be specific, we can change things?

Unfortunately, I'm not a legislator. So I can't be specific. I know that attention needs to be paid and we may want to start with a system that harbors and shields bullies rather than exposing them and allowing them to answer for their actions.

Why is it beyond the schools ability to redress this child? Why is it beyond the schools ability to inform the child's parents that there are outstanding complaints against him? Why is it beyond the schools ability to remove the child from school permanently given his record of bullying? Why are the schools allowed to be afraid of a parent suing them? If the child has sufficient cause to be sent to detention it would be better to ask what he was accused of and what the problem is rather than simply defending your child because you operate under the delusion that your child does no wrong. I have corrected several parents on this delusion and I will continue to correct even more should the need arise.

Yes, the parents should be teaching the child better. But the school is responsible for all the kids in it and must pick up where the parents leave off. Just because there are bad parents out there doesn't mean the schools have to accept being unsafe.

We all need to stand up and demand a system that works. And we all need to take responsibility for the system when it doesn't. Don't make it my responsibility to fix the entire school system, I'm not that good. But I do recognize an untenable situation when I see it and this is one of them.

I think you're now getting to the heart of the matter. Why are schools afraid of parents suing them? Because it eats into their operating funds, it makes the school look bad, and threatens the careers of all the administrators. Yes, they need to be more empowered to make decisions for the good of the students. But even you, Henry, advocated suing the school for not providing a safe environment. Sometimes lawsuits do more harm than good in serving the overall purpose.

Screaming about how "someone needs to fix this" without offering any practical solutions (or even any ideas) does no good. It may be that no one has any good ideas; at least nothing that won't piss off a lot of people in the process, and not be implementable because of legal reasons. It is really that bad.

I, for one, do NOT advocate putting the schools in the position of "picking up where the parents leave off". Parenting is the job of the parents. It should not be up to the schools to teach our kids values. Rather, it is their job to teach our kids those other fundamental skills that will turn them into functional members of society. They should be empowered to do what is necessary to acheive that goal.

Most bullies were bullied when they were younger, so society should keep that in mind. Neither boy handled it well, but the level of violence Casey displayed should not have been to what it was. Hindsight is 20/20 when Casey thinks back to understand he could have seriously hurt the other boy, but I can't help but wonder how the story would go down if the "bully" would have gotten his head bashed on the ground and suffered brain damage, ended up paralyzed, or even worse. I hope Casey is in therapy and learning better coping skills and gaining self esteem. There are 2 sides to every story. We've seen one from each boy, but we have yet to see the truth. The "bully" is a 12 year old boy. A 12 year old is not going to make the best decisions. A 16 year old has some better sense about him than a 12 year old, rather scrawny, boy. If Casey wanted the punches to stop, he could have easily grabbed the other boy's hands. This went beyond self defense and is very worrisome. If there is that much rage and anger in the boy's heart, he needs to seek help. The other boy needs some help, too. He has scars and peer pressure beating him down to get to that level. Does anyone ever really stop to think why bullies became bullies? If this video was not put on youtube, Casey could have very well became a bully. The students would now fear him and he'd be feeling like he's getting revenge for all those years of torment. It's a terrible cycle.

Regarding the boy in Australia, Casey Heynes, a long overdue point has been made. School should be a safe place and a safe time. Although I am 61, I cannot remember it ever being so. My first years in elementary school saw gangs of kids from 6 to 9 beating up on other kids. Fighting back in self defense was punishable by suspension. In the 7th grade I was made to fight by a vice principle, Jefferson Davis the III (The great grandson of the President of the Confederacy) who took bets on who would win after a boy named Roland repeatedly kicked me in the "privates" one day after another. I have cervical vertebrae damage from a kid who used to run up behind me and give me "karate chops" when I was 13. I was chased home by 14 boys on bicycles who only left after I pulled out an empty BB gun and pretended to load and fire.

I have suffered from depression the vast majority of my life because of this type of behavior on the part of others. I now substitute teach and it still has not changed.

The teachers (schools) are as much to blame as the student who bullies because those who are already being punished get punished again. We are not even allowed to interfere, because if we touch the kids to separate them, we can be blamed for their bruises and fired.

Great Job Casey!

Sloopy17, I honestly hope you watched the videos, this boy, Casey, was bullied for YEARS. Now, maybe you've never been bullied by everyone around you, abandoned by your friends, and hit, slapped upside the head and DUCT-TAPED TO A POLE, but I think had you been, you would be more understanding of the boy's actions. I can honestly say that I haven't either, so I don't know the full extent either, but -I- believe that he has good reason to be that angry. Have you ever snapped at someone? You know how you can't control what you say and then regret it later? Add years worth of torment into that anger, add physical force, and I'm sure that you get worse than Casey's retaliation, which, had it been me, would've had a few kicks in there for good measure that everyone who had bullied me, had they watched the video, would've stopped their bullying. And this 12 year old bully, of course he's not going to make the best decisions, but that doesn't mean that we can just let it happen and say," Oh, he'll grow up, he'll learn what he's doing is wrong." That's -why- it got this far, that's -why- Casey HAD to throw this kid down. Yes, the amount of force and anger in the attacks could've harmed the other kid well beyond what was happening physically to Casey, but, as stated above, when you snap, you lose control, and I think we should applaud him for being the better man for so long. Being the better man for YEARS, that is, and we should applaud him for finally standing up for himself and physically stating that enough is enough.

you know saying to be "civil" is well and good but truthfully now days it doesn't work because to work those in charge need to care. most cases they don't anymore in school or out of it doesn't mater and they will often try and hide the issues when they do finally get beyond a "local" level (teacher, principal, or even in workplaces with supervisors) while the focus here is with schools it's all rooted in the same issues. the bullies don't back down and going to a teacher will likely get you something to the lines of "i didn't see it so i can't do anything" or they brush you off.

for example when i was in elementary school i used to have to wear lifts (not really sure the spelling in this case) in my shoes if i didn't i couldn't wear shoes because of issues with my feet. on a daily basis the bullies would steal them from me and teachers would just watch as i would try to get them all the while in pain cause even walking without them hurt. what did teachers do? nothing as far as they cared it was an issue i should handle myself. few months later they followed me home and knocked me unconscious. i came to about an hour later and even then no one would do anything.

even after something that could have very well killed me teachers just didn't care. i don't say Casey is right in the amount of force he used but with how things are i can't fault him for fighting back cause it doesn't end with just school it follows you the rest of your life and until people start caring you can't really count on anyone to come to your aid no mater how bad it gets. oh and as to walking away that just leaves you more open a hit to the back or the neck and if your already getting hit in the face where do you think the bully will hit when your back is turned?

now that all might be in my area i don't know but that's how things are here

I'm glad you intend to teach your children differently, Chad. Sometimes that's all we can do; learn from our mistakes and pass those lessons to the next generation. Unfortunately, being a victim sticks with you for life. It's often very difficult to get past the very painful emotions that bullying does to a person. Children, especially teenagers, need to feel they are a part of some group. Family can be enough, but in todays culture, too often the relationships kids have at school eclipse that, and become a predominant force in shaping our individual selves.

Chad, the problem now is that you need to apologize to those you bullied. Are you going to do that? As one who was bullied from age 5 until age 18, I can say without a doubt that the wounds have been life-long. No one has ever apologized for the psychological torture I was put through all the way from kindergarten until 12th grade. I've not ever been able to really establish any sort of a long-term relationship because of the underlying damage done to me. Oh, and I'm now 56 years old.

Not to be derogatory Michael, but there comes a time when you must take control of your own self-image. I was bullied for as long or longer than you, some even came from my father. I've been to psychologists that have told me they've met Vietnam vets in better mental shape than I was. But they also guided me through the fear and helped me form my own self-image. One that was not based on others failed ability to understand or sympathize with me.

That is what needs to be taught to children today: don't let others define you.

Michael

I'm now 30. As I've stated ... there are few areas in my life (if any) where I have any regrets. The way I, and my friends treated our peers, is one of them. It's a source of great shame that I will carry the rest of my life.

No, I haven't sought out those who may have felt bullied. Though I've thought of it, I no longer live in my hometown and I have little means of tracking people down. But, the bigger questions is would they want me to resurface in the first place? Why would I wish to open old wounds? Haven't the actions of my youth caused enough pain? I couldn't bare to think I caused even more emotional damage to these people by returning in their lives.

As I stated. I grew up without a father-influence. While that's no excuse, with this absence, I grew up thinking I needed to fend for myself and provide for myself. I grew up fast and I grew up somewhat hard. Consequently, it was the emotions of others and the empathy to connect with them that I lacked.

I was a scared, punk kid who has learned some pretty tough lessons as I've grown into a man. I like to think that's what life is: Learning from your mistakes, learning not to repeat them, and if I'm able ... instilling a bit of wisdom within those close to me so they need not make the same mistakes as I did.

All I can do is be open with you. I can't take back what I did, and I can't make things shiny and new with an apology from the past. I can however be honest with you and with myself. Hopefully you, and others, can take some solace in the fact that people make mistakes (especially in their youth). We all have regrets and things we wish we could change, do differently, but can't.

But, it's what we choose to do with the years that we have left that matters.

I agree with Henry. Everyone, despite whatever influences or traumas they may have had to encounter in life, has to take responsibility for how they let those influences define them. Life is about our future choices, not our past ones. No one should live wallowing in their past misery. It can be impossible to forget, but an apology does little good.

Henry, when the torture goes on on a daily basis for as long as it did, you never get the chance to build the defenses or learn how to build your own self-image because, in my case, it was destroyed on a daily basis.

On a daily basis? For 56 years? I'm amazed you can function at all. My condolences.

i was always the smaller, weaker one in school, bullied every day constantly, even on the school bus. it got so bad i would ride my bike 15 miles to school each day, always received tardy passes, even in the pouring rain. nobody, and i mean nobody, teachers, guidance counselors, or principal gave a holy hoot in hell.now if they have'nt been shot by the police for robbery, the rest who survived are drug dealers or pimps. they will get what they deserve, eventually. to the larger bullied boy, i give an oi oi. to the little brat who started the whole deal,you finally met your match, i hope you learn to clean up your act, and keep your hands and mouth to yourself

Chad,

With all due respect, it sounds like your heart is in the right place (sort of) but it's a chickensh** attitude that you don't have the resources to find those you tortured to apologize. Have you ever heard of Facebook? It's free and most people in America are on it. It's pure cowardice to claim that you cannot find people.

As someone who was terrorized by classmates from elementary school through early high school years (regular beatings, name calling, death threats, social ostracization, etc) because I was imaginative and smart as well as smaller and wasn't much into the 'guy' things like sports and degrading women with talk of body parts, I would love it if someone from that time would be a man and own up to their responsibility of having made my life a living hell. I never considered killing myself (I wouldn't give them the satisfaction) but it was nearly impossible to get through some days and as soon as I could, I got away from them. My parents did what they could but as soon as I would "tell" on someone, that kids friends would be even worse to me. It was a losing battle especially when the bullies were the principal's son and the football coaches son.

To Henry, I'm 47, and when you spend your formative years constantly on the defensive, constantly seeing the world through the "who's going to attack me next" lens, it takes a long long time to recover and find a different way of living and reacting to the world. Those that haven't gone through it have no idea what it's like (and you should be very grateful).

It's very sad to me that there are others like me who have gone through this but I have to admit that over the past few months hearing so many other stories of others who were bullied as bad as I was, it's made a difference in my life.

Andrew,

With all due respect, I wouldn't join facebook if I was offered money.

Maybe I should clarify a few things. I wasn't physically abusive. I never hit anyone or caused any physical harm. What I was talking about was the consolidated mindset with which my friends and I approached high school life and our peers. It was a collaborative effort, and one that I often reflect on and wish I could have done differently. That's it. I'm not going to track someone down and say: "Hey, remember how me and my friends were not very nice in school ... totally sorry about that."

To me, that cheapens what I feel. And again, it's not that I don't want to put forth the time or energy, it's that I don't want to trivialize the issue with some generic apology for something that happened 15 years ago.

So no.

To me, nothing I've said is "chickensh**, cowardice, or sort of good hearted."

I wanted to express my regret in an open and honest way. I wanted to explain how not all punk kids grow up to be degenerate men. But, from what I've read on this thread from many individuals on the opposite side of the bullying spectrum as I, it seems some have grown up to be the very thing they hated most as kids.

AndrewNYC:

Those that haven't gone through it have no idea what it's like (and you should be very grateful).

What makes you think I haven't gone through it? That's awfully presumptuous of you. To think that, because I'm not crying in my milk 30 years later, I never went through what you went through.

For those wondering, I got my ass kicked every weekday from when I was 5 till I hit high school. I've had my glasses thrown down sewer grates and had to go get them... with no glasses on. I was teased and beaten in every class I attended. But I knew something they didn't - They were wrong about me.

My parents saw fit to install in me a sense of worth that wasn't dependent on others to validate me. I knew I was smart because I got the answers right. Not because someone told me but because I was right.

To sit there and declare your suffering to be so much worse than mine without ever having known me is the epitome of egotism. Looks like all that bullying taught you nothing about humility.

Well said Laura!

Why is it such a bad thing to aggrandize violence to others? Really? Well, let's start with the fact that this kid is now being celebrated for being violent and the bully is being vilified beyond his maturity to understand. How's that for a why?

You would rather this bully, who is admittedly wrong for attacking this kid so mercilessly, go through life as "The Bully from that YouTube video"? Remember, the Internet doesn't die. So in 20 years you will be able to find this story with names and all, and the video of the incident. I don't feel sorry for the bully getting hit, he was out of bounds for what he was doing. But I don't think it needs to be immortalized so that it can haunt him the rest of his days.

I also think "Telling" is a perfectly rational response to bullying. And if it doesn't do anything, tell someone else. And then tell someone else. How did he manage to get video of this incident but not any other incident? And if there were video of it then why not take that video, of him getting bullied and not fighting, to the principal, or superintendent of schools or even the police. Keep telling until someone listens.

We are now talking about teaching our kids to stand up to bullies. How about we teach our parents to listen when a kid says he's being bullied? How about making the schools more responsive when our children are bullied? How about believing in our children?

No, he's not being celebrated for being violent. He's being celebrated because he refused to remain a victim of someone else's violence. I don't think it is beyond the maturity of the bully in the video to understand why he is being vilified. Children from a very young age have the ability to understand basic right and wrong.

And having this video haunt him for the rest of his days may ensure he doesn't pass this on to the next generation. He'll be forgiven for his immaturity, but held accountable for learning a lesson.

So, violence and humiliation for everyone? OK, you asked for it.

Henry, I believe you're seeing what others are saying and taking it to extremes, sir. Or maybe misinterpreting them.

Either way, no one here is saying to get violent immediately. What the boy did was in self-defense. Like, how some parents send their children to learn martial arts to protect themselves when and if they see no other peaceful solution. For all we know, maybe the boy DID go to the teachers or other adult and nothing was done. Or the bully found a way around it.

Obviously, the boy had enough and did enough damage to stop the bully. Nothing more, nothing less. I'm not seeing the boy pull a weapon out or continue beating on the bully. Then, that would be getting violent. What he did was justified and maybe this incident getting media attention will give other victims a glimmer of hope to say maybe their bully isn't untouchable either. Something can be done to stop them, in a non-extreme way.

I'm all for peaceful resolutions. But sometimes, there are none to be had.

As someone that was bullied most of their childhood, I accept that there are times when you have to resort to violence. I just wish this situation, rather than put a spotlight on bullying, would put a spotlight on the broken system we call "education". RandomB says above that the system is broken, and they are right. Rather than celebrate this we should be asking ourselves "How did we let this kids situation get so bad he felt violence was his only recourse?" (and for those wondering, yes, I know this happened in Australia. But if you think it doesn't happen here, you're fooling yourself!)

That is awesome! I don't understand why kids want to bully. What are they really getting from hurting others?

I know right? How is it the victims fault? The little sh*t's parents probably told them that he was doing nothing wrong and didn't deserve to be bodyslammed. Its about time we look into the parents of the bullies...what is going on at home, or what is their home lacking that they feel this is ok.

That's what I was wondering! If the parents had actually done something rather than standing around doing NOTHING, then mabye he wouldn't have had to retaliate like he did.

Thank you! Someone asking the good questions. We don't just leave our kids in school and hope they make it home alive. We leave them in the care of someone. An entire staff, in fact. So where was that staff? Why didn't Casey feel safe at school? Why didn't the teachers take steps to confront this bullying?

And this wasn't just bullying - this was physical assault. This wasn't name calling or teasing, this is a misdemeanor. The school should be held accountable as should the bully's parents. The whole situation needs to be addressed, not just the victimology.

Parents are usually limited in what they can do beyond the school's willingness to step in and take some action. According to this story, fights were common at the school, so I'm deducing that the school wasn't willing in this case.

Then there are civil laws in place that do address these issues. Take the kids parent to court a couple of times. Take the school system to court for not providing a safe environment... DO something! Don't just say "Well, sometimes you're gonna get hit. What can I say. Hit him back, that'll work".

I find that approach just moves the point that you "stand there and take it" down the line. Now the parents are being bullied by the school and the system that says their kids have to grow up in an environment like this. Make the parents stand up too. EVERYONE should stand up for what is right! Not because it'll work but because IT'S WHAT'S RIGHT!

You'd rather the bad guy win because you'd rather not be bothered? THAT'S pitiful.

When going to the teachers and administrators doesn't work (and I never have seen it work), you have to teach your child that they should not accept being a punching bag. You teach them to not antagonize, not belittle, not throw the first punch. But a child should never be taught that it is acceptable to be the subject of abuse.

Henry, you can't sue the parents of the bully. When the schools do document conflict between students, they can't reveal the identity of the other students for legal reasons. Sure, here there's video, but in 99.99% of cases? Nada.

School officials are so worried about getting sued by parents, that they overlook actual conflict and wrongdoing by students, and fall back on "teaching" that acceptance, tolerance, and getting-along are the right things to do. These lessons fail if they aren't enforced in the child's home as well. Again, when what should happen doesn't work, there has to be a backup plan to protect the child.

I'm pretty sure that if someone hit you, you'd know who it was. There isn't "nada", there's the kid who got hit. He has the ability to bring evidence and that evidence should implicate someone.

As for the rest, I'm not arguing, and never have, that the kid simply lay down and take it. I'm asking why do we tolerate a system that operates the way you suggest? Why is this discussion about the kids and who bullied whom? Why isn't this generating discussion about how to improve a system that cannot stop what is not only known conflict but videotaped and broadcast? Casey stood up for himself, fine. What I'd like to say to Casey is, I'm sorry for letting it gets to this point.

Oh, I'm not saying the child doesn't know and/or can't tell who the bully is. I'm saying the school won't divulge any information about the student's parents, address, or home phone. They won't even confirm the bully is the student you know it is.

It's called "discovery" and it's built into the legal system.

In any case, if the school wants to keep it in-house, why not provide counseling for the bully and confrontational counseling for his parents? Why not move the kid to a school that specializes in troubled teens? In the school district I grew up in we had a school just for those kind of people.

In any case, like an other poster said, it's not like I condemn Casey, he did what he had to do. I condemn the school and the system for putting him in that position.

I condemn the school and the system for putting him in that position.

Fair enough. On that I agree.

Why not move the kid to a school that specializes in troubled teens?

Bureacracy. Schools can't kick a student out without a lot of paperwork. Remember, it's all about the student's right to be there, no matter how much they infringe on the rights of the other students.

All I know is my son was bullied at school. I went to the teachers and head person of the school, to no prevail did it do any good.. I even asked them to put the student out and all they said was they have talked to the other childs parents and that was all they could do, I explained to them that me and my husaband had taught our son that fighting was wrong,and now we have to go back and tell him something different? they told me well I guess you'd have to. So see going to the adults don't make a difference, sometimes the child has no choice but to protect himself. in this case maybe it will be all over since he got the head bully the followers will stop too. In my childs case he finally hit back and it stopped.It's sad that it comes to this but this is reality."the real world".

I was also going to post that I thought he was lying about being bullied by Casey first. He demeanor and the way he handled himself when throwing the punches belies the fact that he was the aggressor, and make it highly doubtful that Casey did anything to him earlier.

I feel sorry that you were put in that position. No child should have to put up with that treatment. And no school should allow two children to participate in violent actions to resolve conflict. That's unacceptable.

I hate the phrase "allow yourself to be victimized." It totally places the blame on the victim, whether that is what you mean to do or not. And that common phrase (and inherent, though often unrecognized, attitude behind it) is the very reason most kids will not seek help when they are being bullied. Because when they do, they are told it is their own fault for "allowing" it to happen. That is such cr@p! I'm sorry, but it is. I, like many of you on here, spent many years of my life being bullied. I, like some others, did eventually fight back. I was a geekish girl in a school full of preppy little social climbers, bullied psychologically by the other girls and physically by a couple of boys. In the 7th grade, after one taunt too many and being intentionally smacked with a ball in gym class one last time, I took on the school bully. I left him with scars that still had not faded by the next year. Did I earn respect from my peers? Sure. Did anyone bully me for the rest of the year? No. Did I get in trouble? No - I was the straight A student, the "good girl," and everyone knew he was a bullly. Was I proud of myself? Hell no. I hated, and still do, that I lost control like that. That was not the person I ever want to be. Sure, I stood up to the bully, I refused to "allow" myself to be bullied any more. But I ask you -- Why should it have been "allowed" to reach that point?? Everyone knew he was a bully (all adults at the school, too), yet no one intervened until it had gone too far. Why is it acceptable to let these things go until the subject of the bullying is pushed to do things they do not want to do, become something they do not want to be, in order to make it stop? Why don't we deserve protection from these creeps? Why is it our fault for "allowing" it to be done to us??

Because you can't expect to go through life with a guardian angel. Sometimes you have to be your own.

And trust me, sometimes you're going to want to "lose control" - you've got to vent at some point. If you don't, it'll be bad.

But don't beat yourself up over it anymore. What's done is done and what is in the past is in the past. You learned some experience in life that others may not ever get (we can only be kids once in life, after all) and you may never know what positive ripples came out of your actions, whether your actions were "bad" or not.

sometimes you cant walk away. Some people will not allow it.

Yeah, I understand I just wish that people wouldn't be bullies in the first place. If Richard had been bullied he would have understood how it feels and not want to go and punch him. But I think boys are different in that aspect.

"Where are the teachers? Why aren't they helping these 2 kids work out there issues. "

Teachers and authorities don´t handle bullying. They will tell kids to be friends and sing awimbawe. Next day, there will be more bullying, and teachers will start bulling the victim. If victims can´t count on authorities and teachers for justice, it´s a mater of taking maters into their own hands. It´s the only solution when you can´t count on "adults"(sic) for help.

Teachers and authorities don´t handle bullying.

And THAT is our point!!! Why not?!? That is unacceptable! If I were Casey's parents I'd be headed to court to sue that school for not providing a safe environment for my children. If we don't make the system work all we are doing is teaching our kids that they can't depend on authority. They are then left to their own devices to extract justice from the system. Not a cheery outlook if you ask me.

The "just ignore it and walk away" bit is so stupid and useless. Bullies have legs, too, they can follow the victim! If parents and teachers can't be counted on to stop the bully, then what other choice did Casey have? He was getting punched, for goodness' sake!

So it's wrong to physically defend ourselves if we're getting beaten on? If you're a woman and you're getting raped is it wrong to fight your attacker, or are you supposed to try to "just walk away and tell someone"? How is this really all that different? He was being physically attacked, good for him for fighting back and defending himself.

I am not, nor have I ever condemned what Casey did. I'm asking why the system put him in the position of having to do it?

Well as a parent I would hold the bullies parents liable. If I heared about this happening to any one of my children I would take it up with the bullies parents. If that didn't work, I just might have to kick the sh!t out of that parent. That's intervention.

exactly... i think they both learned a good lesson... think the little kid had a bad case of "Small Man Syndrome"

Amen!!

Makes me wonder why that hasn't been tried. Too many people think the answer to physical threat is a counter threat. What about working with the antagonist to ameliorate the feelings that make them want to bully?